Many of us go through life, dissatisfied with our romantic relationships. We get this promise of “Happily Ever After” stuck in our noggins and that promise is like the prison walls in the Alcatraz. We find ourselves stuck inside of them with no way out!

The reality is that men and women are both disillusioned. However, interestingly enough it’s in different ways. After doing some research, I discovered that the reason behind the disenchantment really comes down to this. Men expect women to behave like men (logic-based,hunters) yet portray the soft feminine qualities that they yearn for in a woman. And women expect men to behave like women (sensitive, attentive, emotional) but strong and protective.

Is there any wonder why there’s so much confusion in the dating/relationships world?

In the fairytale story of Cinderella (written by Frenchman Charles Perrault), as soon as prince charming lays his eyes on Cinderella, he is transfixed by her and it becomes his mission to get her feminine attention so that he can become alive. They dance and then she has to run away before she turns back into her old self. Of course, the prince is intrigued and chases after her, only to find the glass slipper. In order to find her, he has to find the match to that slipper. This results in a mystery adventure game (offering much of the fun that..hmm..Sony Playstation provides?)

Incidentally ladies…men are wired to solve problems and find solutions. They are deer hunters. This goes back to the cave man days!

Then, there’s Cinderella herself. With the help of her community of mice and Godmother, she’s transformed into a beautiful vision. And that beauty which shines outwardly and inwardly attracts the young prince and promises her that out of the hundreds of other belles at the ball, she alone will stick out as being the MOST beautiful and then she’ll be sure to not only get his attention be be selected as his PRINCESS. And then, only then can she truly relax.

This might be an outdated fairytale but nothing has changed in all the centuries since Perrault first wrote it. The reality is that a majority of the misunderstandings between men and women could be solved if only people would learn from this fairytale. Now, I know that there are feminists out there crying out right about now saying “Cinderella is a sexist story” or “Cinderella was co-dependent”…”There is no such thing as happily ever after”. All these are valid statements and I’m not denying them but for the sake of simplicity, I’m just addressing the use of the fairytale to outline some common differences between the sexes.

Attn: MEN
Women are hard-wired with a need to feel that they are the most beautiful woman/creature in your life and that you will not abandon your cave and its dwellers (your lady, children,etc) for another woman’s inviting cave.

If you want to make your woman melt in your arms, all you have to do is make her feel like the most important thing in the world to you. Don’t worry. This doesn’t have to be a minute to minute job. If you do find yourself in a situation with a woman who requires that, get out now! Her neediness is based on other issues that YOU CAN’T FIX(yes I can hear you saying I CAN) Stop the madness!

If you two are married and haven’t had a date in a while, plan one! Tell her to open her schedule for “x” night and to get dolled up because you want to show off your woman.

She will go to bed the giddiest woman on the block that night..complete with visions of wardrobe changes, hairstyle options and perfumes to be worn!

Attn: WOMEN

Your man wants to be your hero..plain and simple. There’s no other way to put it. So let him. Stop taking that privelege away from him. He wants to be your prince and see that you appreciate and acknowledge just how princely he is.

Give him the feminine attention that he craves.

Sometimes, we get annoyed or angry when it seems like our guy is too busy to give us attention so we punish him by ignoring him or putting down something he’s doing. My guess is that he’s just running around chasing other metaphorical glass slippers (i.e. finding solutions to problems). But, don’t get upset thinking that he’s going to abandon you.

You are his only Cinderella and that’s why he spends so much time trying to be your hero (if you’ll only open your eyes to it)!

Ultimately, LOVE is the happily ever after and the ABRACADABRA that even Cinderella’s fairy godmother can’t concoct out of thin air. It takes work and understanding to be able to fully open your heart to another and give from a place of generosity. But, once you really get that the opposite sex is perfect “as is”, your life will be a fairytale.