I saw a movie last night that disturbed me effectively enough to keep me awake till the wee hours in the morning and sleep with my knees raised to my chest, arms around my knees as I did as a little girl when I felt hit with an emotional snowball right between the eyes.

What caused this reaction? A simple thriller movie called PASSENGERS starring Anne Hathaway and Patrick Wilson. First of all, I admit that it’s my biggest pet peeve when people spoil movies so please excuse me for doing just that in this blog.

In the film, Anne Hathaway plays a therapist who is hired to counsel five passengers who survived a deadly plane crash and she helps them relive the traumatic moments on the plane so that they can express the repressed emotions. But, slowly, the passengers start disappearing all the while she’s having an affair with one of them. Ready for the spoiler?? It turns out that HOLY SMOKES she was on that plane crash and she’s dead too. So she’s basically dead in the whole movie and what we’re watching is a movie length rendition of those last minutes in her life when she was realizing she was being faced with a head on collision with death.

Now, to some people-this might just be an ordinary movie with a smart twist. For me, it was a kick I needed to get me off my butt and out of this unawake phase I’ve been going through in my life for the last month. The film helped me to realize that all we are doing right now is living that moment between being alive and dead. In essence, we’re all basically dying. We may not be sick yet we’re still dying because we’re mortal. We can’t help it. It’s how we choose to live in the ” in between” that we have control over and we can make it any kind of movie we want which is what Anne Hathaway’s character does by choosing to have a romance with Eric (played by Patrick Wilson). In real life, she was stuffy and controlled. But in those moments in between when the plane is on fire, she relives her life as it could have played out and it gets fueled by her imagination to be a life of her dreams. Only she never really got to live that one. But, I can. And you can.

This holiday season, I challenge you to WAKE UP. Breathe. Lay in a meadow with your arms sprawled out to your sides and soak up everything through your senses as you appreciate the fact that although we’re dying, it’s not till we really release the fear of it…in that moment when the plane is crashing and you give up all control…not till you’re really fearless..can you really truly be free.

Maybe, that’s how Jesus felt when he was on the cross. Maybe, that’s how Ghandi felt when he was ready to risk his health and life for his country. I believe that it’s only when we really surrender our control that we get the answers we need.